{"id":3550,"date":"2022-04-11T09:21:56","date_gmt":"2022-04-11T16:21:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/?p=3550"},"modified":"2024-12-09T10:07:17","modified_gmt":"2024-12-09T18:07:17","slug":"four-poems-by-devin-becker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/four-poems-by-devin-becker\/","title":{"rendered":"Four Poems by Devin Becker"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
\n
\n\n
\"87<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Found in\u00a0Willow Springs 76<\/em><\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Back to Author Profile<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n

\n\n

Four Poems by Devin Becker<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

Ben Lerner<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben, my high school best friend, Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

is nothing like you except<\/p>\n\n\n\n

you look<\/p>\n\n\n\n

very much like brothers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You are both Midwestern too,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

as I am, (as everyone is)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

so I bet,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

you grew up with the same excitement<\/p>\n\n\n\n

about the new Applebee’s and other<\/p>\n\n\n\n

late 20th century upheavals in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

monetary and food cultures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ain’t it all the same, Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

aren’t we all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

like all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

like each other<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

one another      like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

one, and the simulacrum of one,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

which is two,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

if you believe in the Other,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

which you do, Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

you do, I know you–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

or I don’t, really,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I just read you but<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know people who<\/p>\n\n\n\n

do know you like Ed<\/p>\n\n\n\n

& Elizabeth and Erika.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

They say you’re smart, Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and you are,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it’s obvious–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

your books are like A+ papers,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

they won’t give a red pen<\/p>\n\n\n\n

grip–so<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have trouble<\/p>\n\n\n\n

continuing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

to address you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in your absence<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(fearing you’ll think this<\/p>\n\n\n\n

stupid)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

but I keep<\/p>\n\n\n\n

doing it because<\/p>\n\n\n\n

doing it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

as both our childhoods taught us<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

is really, really important.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Supremely so.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was almost our first lesson,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

save for our first<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

first lesson, which was:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Envy all the fruits<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

of your neighbors,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

and didn’t your backyard<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

back up to a golf course<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and didn’t you hit the errant balls<\/p>\n\n\n\n

back at the yuppies<\/p>\n\n\n\n

who sliced them<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

& who were not<\/p>\n\n\n\n

yuppies<\/p>\n\n\n\n

you realized later<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(when you learned how<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

culturally irrelevant<\/p>\n\n\n\n

your hometown really was)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but just people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

like you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

who had no hunger<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that wasn’t fed to them<\/p>\n\n\n\n

years before their weekly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

45-minute waits<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

with the buzzer<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that lights up red and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

shakes when your table’s ready–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

We grew up with it all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

coming to fruition, Ben–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

they quantified and quaffable<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and made it profitable,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

their logic<\/p>\n\n\n\n

becoming so<\/p>\n\n\n\n

essential, so undeniable<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that now<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

we hardly question<\/p>\n\n\n\n

why the buzzing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

makes us      (each time!)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

feel as if we’ve won something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Koan Head<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’m trying<\/p>\n\n\n\n

what I can to learn<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to unthink, Ben–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not to<\/p>\n\n\n\n

not think<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(mind you)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

rather<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to understand<\/p>\n\n\n\n

the reason<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I say<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I think<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

but not<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I beat my heart.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lerner<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Growing up, we cut down<\/p>\n\n\n\n

everyone,      Ben<\/p>\n\n\n\n

we exhausted<\/p>\n\n\n\n

into hilarity      the material<\/p>\n\n\n\n

of our failures<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And like any sort of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

love<\/p>\n\n\n\n

this marked us      inferior<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to the point that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

now  we only know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

we’re friends with someone if<\/p>\n\n\n\n

each of us can say      something<\/p>\n\n\n\n

so accurate about the other<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it devastates, emotionally<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but stays funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And this is<\/p>\n\n\n\n

good laughter sometimes (sometimes<\/p>\n\n\n\n

even restorative)                 but it catches up to you, Ben<\/p>\n\n\n\n

turns inward when you’re older and your<\/p>\n\n\n\n

guy friends dry up<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and you have                 adult friends,                 which are worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once established, our childhood defense\/social systems<\/p>\n\n\n\n

need to feed on something and this is you,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben, becomes you,      Ben,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

which prompts that famous,       poetic discovery:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I is an other<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and he’s a dick<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and he hates you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

which seems wrong in this century,         when all the other others are all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

like:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like!               I Like it!         and       Look!          I like it!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

like it was never cool to dislike everything,        which we all know it was.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wish<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’d more enthusiasm generally,     more joy,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and maybe that will come, Ben, and maybe<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I will take it easy       and vice versa:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

maybe I and I we’ll both                  follow each other,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

read each other’s walls as we text each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Eat each other’s feeds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

10:05<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Everything’s been<\/p>\n\n\n\n

made fun of<\/p>\n\n\n\n

already,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ben; been<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

mad funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What’s left<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but to praise everything,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

anything,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

post it all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

so it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

means something;<\/p>\n\n\n\n

fix it all in bits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I mean<\/p>\n\n\n\n

what am I even<\/p>\n\n\n\n

doing here<\/p>\n\n\n\n

typing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

when I could be<\/p>\n\n\n\n

pasting this<\/p>\n\n\n\n

into the internet,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

embedding my picture–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Oh but who am I<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to grimace<\/p>\n\n\n\n

at this newest messaging.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/p>\n\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":25234,"featured_media":614,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpo365_audiences":[],"wpo365_private":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3550","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-featured-work"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3550"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/25234"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3550"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3550\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":37556,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3550\/revisions\/37556"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/614"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3550"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3550"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/test-inside.ewu.edu\/willowspringsmagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3550"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}